Is your calendar so booked that you need to pretend to have time if your own? Do you find yourself trying to find an extra space to help one more person? Do we have any concept of personal boundaries anymore or is that a myth of days gone by?
This is a parent problem of the ages. Expectations of parenting seem to be depleting our lives and minds of rest, recuperation, mediation and peace. Please don’t get me wrong, being a parent is a gift and we do enjoy it (most of the time), but there are moments that we hit our limits and it happens to all of us.
Recently, I had to pull my husband aside and call an audible that I was beyond frustrated, burnt out and depleted from taking on all the tasks that were being thrown at me. Dropping kids off, paying the bills, working full time, figuring out schooling for our daughters, trying to keep on being present for our daughter who doesn’t speak English, finding time to take care of a sick family member, and the list goes on. I don’t even need to ask for a show of hands for who has experienced this.
We want our kids to be involved in everything their heart desires, but we need to take a realistic look at our days. We only have 24 little hours to plug in and most of the time, we aren’t accounting for sleep, staying in the Word and having a conversation with our Father. We also want to be there for our friends and family who might need our help or the school that calls us for help or you are needed to volunteer for this, that or the other thing.
Here is a little truth in love, you can’t do it all. God doesn’t ask you to do it all. God doesn’t want you to do it all. Take a deep breathe because you are doing great moms and dads.
Here is a challenge. Go through your days and talk to God about this. Where does he want you to lean in? Where does he want you to take your foot off the gas? I will guarantee he is asking you to find time for him. It is in Him, that we find our refuge and peace. Often, parents get so distracted by what is happening in their world, that they forget to turn to Him in the hurricane of the day.
It is ok to say no, or not right now, or I need to pull back from an activity. You need to have your cup filled with the Spirit of God because you can’t do it all if you are running on empty. Just and FYI, the world will not stop if you say no to something when asked.
It is going to be ok, honestly and truly. You might ask if I am writing this blog to myself, and you would be correct. Even pastors need a gentle reminder that God doesn’t expect us to be a super hero but to be present, engaged and showing the love of Jesus to those around us.
Now, go talk to Him and be refreshed and poured into so you can be the amazing parent that He created you to be.
Philippians 4:6-7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Author
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Jenn is a Pastor on the Lake Forest Mission Team focusing on local mission/ministry efforts and discipleship. Her heart is for those who are hurting and feel they are in the margins. She wants them to know they are seen and loved by their Creator. She is a creative writer for several online platforms and is working on her first novel that will offer hope to those struggling in their faith. After marrying her Prince Charming, Brandon in 2004, God has blessed them with two adopted daughters, each with a unique and amazing story. Loki is their rescued lab/shepherd/snuggle bug mix who keeps them very entertained and well hugged. Jenn earned her BA in Non-Profit Management/Public Relations from Chapman University in 2001 and graduated from Gateway Seminary in May 2023 with a Masters in Theological Essentials. An enteral optimist, she is an expert at seeing the sunshine in most situations and is always looking for a way to brighten your day with a funny quip or a big smile. A little known fact, Jenn used to be on an Improv Comedy troupe and was involved in many acting projects back in the day and would love to find a way to combine her love of performing and Jesus to spread the Good News.
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