7 Ways To Help Kids Gain Confidence

When our kids are little, it seems that they have all the confidence in the world. They can rock that Batman suit or tutu over jeans and mismatched socks like it’s no one’s business while strutting through Target.

As they get older, they start to see things a little different and notice that others might be judging or that they are standing out from others with their creative and unique ways. They start to meld into what the other kids are doing or wearing and tuck away their once cherished toys because they are too old for that now. It breaks my heart to see those fierce and confident personalities start to waiver.

This is about the time that the kids are going through different changes with their bodies and the hormones are starting to kick in. It is such an awkward age for them and sometimes they aren’t sure how to navigate through this. They begin to question what they are wearing, their body shape, their hairstyles or anything that they will see. Their confidence has been shaken and it is a hard thing to get back.

Here are a few things we can do to help kids gain confidence and boost their self-esteem.

  1. Remind them that they are Children of God. “I can do all things though Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13
  2. Set goals for them to achieve and celebrate the victories—big or small.
  3. If they make a mistake, don’t get upset.  Help them see that we all make mistakes and help them find a good solution to remedy the mistake.
  4. We need to let them fail to show them that failure isn’t the end of the world.
  5. Be sure to praise them if they are showing perseverance. Our words of encouragement go a long way!
  6. Be sure they are connected with friends who will help build them up and give them stability.
  7. Be a model of confidence. We can be honest and let them know when we aren’t feeling confident, but show them how we can work through that and come out on the other side.

Every child is different, so we need to be aware of what works for our kids and what doesn’t. We can rely on the knowledge that words are powerful and we can use them to build and strengthen their confidence. Wield those words well and watch your kids blossom.


  • Jennifer Norton

    Jennifer married her Prince Charming, Brandon in 2004. They currently have one amazing daughter, Madi, who was born in 2011 and they were blessed to adopt her from birth. God has also called them to adopt a lovely 15-year-old from Colombia and they are hoping to bring her home in the summer of 2023. Loki is their 4-year-old lab/shepherd/snuggle bug mix who keeps them very entertained and well hugged. She graduated with a BA in Public Relations with an emphasis in Non-Profit Management from Chapman University. Jennifer is currently in her last semester at Gateway Seminary and will be graduating in May 2023 with a Masters in Theological Essentials. She is on the Lake Forest Mission Team focusing on refugee care and other local outreach efforts. Her heart is for those that are hurting and feel that they are in the margins. She wants them to know that they are seen and loved by their Creator. In her spare time, when not studying, she enjoys spending time with family and friends, reading and writing. A little-known fact about Jennifer, is that she was on an Improv Comedy Troupe and misses being on stage, but hopes to combine her love of the stage and Jesus in some creative way.

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